Yuma, AZ

Things I Can and Cannot do in Yuma, Arizona in June

Can: Get a tan like Domino's delivers pizza: in 30 minutes or less.
Can't: get used to the heat or the time difference from EST in less than a week.

Can: Stop and smell the roses
Can't: Figure out what that weird bird is.

Can: Become obsessed with Mr. G's burritos.
Can't: Stop thinking about opening a Mr. G's in Maryland/Delaware.

Can: Be grateful for air conditioning.
Can't: take a cold shower. It's like when the hose has been laying in the sun.

Can: Fly to Yuma with roughly 5 pounds of toiletries in my carry-on bag on 4 difference flights with no one at any airport ever saying a thing.
Can't: Fly out of Yuma with the above 5 pounds of toiletries without getting bag searched and security thinking I'm high maintenance.

Can: see family I haven't seen in years.
Can't: deny we're related or pretend I don't know them at Golden Corral.


Can: see a cactus taller than myself.
Can't: Walk outside barefoot.


Can: drink too much caffeine.
Can't: Drink enough water.

Can: Sit on the patio in the shade and chat/dominate conversation.
Can't: actually cook an egg on the pavement such that it's safe for consumption.

Can: See big (to me) dogs and they get used to me.
Can't: Convince them I don't need dog slobber on me and no they can't have some of this donut.

Can: go to my grandma's viewing.
Can't: Make the lump in my throat go away or forget her.