So here are highlights of 2012 for me. Saving the best for last!
1. My birthday dinner was at The Melting Pot and I put the entire slice of cheesecake into the bananas foster fondue.
2. I started a youth group at church.
3. I got a job as a substitute teacher.
4. I went on a mini vacation to Washington DC and got to see lots of history.
5. I made a bucket list and marked a few things off of it already.
6. I got to see Arizona family again (first time in a decade!).
7. Went to Youth Rally for the first time.
8. Broke a stained glass window.
9. Sang a solo in church.
10. Got an iced tea maker.
11. My son was diagnosed with autism....but he started speech therapy and is finally verbal.
12. Heard my beautiful son say "I love you mommy"!!!!!!!!!!
Monday, January 7, 2013
Friday, December 21, 2012
Curly Hair and 5 Minutes
There are many downsides to curly hair: humidity makes curls a tangled, frizzy mess. I survive on conditioner. My hair can get caught on EVERYTHING. Freshman year of high school I was walking down the hallway and my hair caught the zipper on a senior guy's backpack. I tugged, but it didn't come free! The guy and the three friends with him were laughing at me, I desperately yanked until the hair let go, then I hurried down the hall red-faced. Another time I was sitting next to a friend who was brushing her hair and looking the other way--her brush caught my curls and couldn't get free. Then there was the time I was leaning over and the same friend was putting her plastic choir chair down right next to me. I got the CHAIR LEG caught in my hair! As a bridesmaid I once wore an updo. It took 60 bobby pins (I counted as I took them out) to keep my hair in place, and it was HEAVY. I can't straighten or blow-dry it without majorly damaging it. I have to use product every day.
There are benefits to curly hair too. Lots of volume. When a restroom doesn't have towels or a hand dryer I can dry my hands on my hair. When I want to hide from someone I just pull my hair back (because people look for the big hair), haha. I don't have to blow-dry my hair when it's long. I can do my hair in 5 minutes when it's long. I can go anywhere without a brush (I don't even own one). Wind my hair into a bun and I have a pillow. Dry hair on my neck keeps me a few degrees warmer in the winter.
Loads of women have told me they wish they had my hair. As a little girl I wished I had long, straight, dark brown hair and brown eyes and that I was named Crystal (though I also wanted to work at White Castle and drive a station wagon because of the backward-facing seats in the rear). We tend to think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, but the rest of that sentence should be 'it's just as hard to mow'. We look at other people and wish we had the things we like about them. Many reading this understand that--the slender woman we envy may battle anorexia or be a chain smoker; the man with the successful career may barely know his kids; the student who does it all may be so addicted to caffeine and sleeping pills that she suffers withdrawal without copious amounts of both every day.
We envy other people because it's easier to look at what someone else has/is and be envious than it is to work on/accept ourselves. It's like wishing on a star for stuff to happen. We don't workout at the gym only to be shocked that we are sore the next day. Work equals results. When I want to get better at something or make a new habit, I have to struggle to keep doing that thing (going to the gym, going to bed at the same time each night...). Likewise, if I want to get good at avoiding things, I have to practice that too (no more than one portion of dessert).
So many fitness commercials say they guarantee results in two weeks with just 5 minutes a day. If I spent 5 minutes a day on every last little thing I want to improve upon, and I keep it up for two weeks, it will likely become a habit. Spend 5 minutes cleaning each room in the house and you will see results. Work your abs for 5 minutes a day and you will see results. Read your Bible for 5 minutes a day and you will grow in knowledge. Pray for 5 minutes a day. Sit in silence for 5 minutes a day. It sounds so easy. For some habits it is, but for others this is HARD. I blame our own weaknesses and our cultural ADHD. I find the struggle is worthwhile once I see results, but during the struggle it can be hard to stay positive.
UPDATE: regarding my plan to help with hurricane Sandy relief, I am sketching out a 3 day trip for the youth to go somewhere in the area.
There are benefits to curly hair too. Lots of volume. When a restroom doesn't have towels or a hand dryer I can dry my hands on my hair. When I want to hide from someone I just pull my hair back (because people look for the big hair), haha. I don't have to blow-dry my hair when it's long. I can do my hair in 5 minutes when it's long. I can go anywhere without a brush (I don't even own one). Wind my hair into a bun and I have a pillow. Dry hair on my neck keeps me a few degrees warmer in the winter.
Loads of women have told me they wish they had my hair. As a little girl I wished I had long, straight, dark brown hair and brown eyes and that I was named Crystal (though I also wanted to work at White Castle and drive a station wagon because of the backward-facing seats in the rear). We tend to think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, but the rest of that sentence should be 'it's just as hard to mow'. We look at other people and wish we had the things we like about them. Many reading this understand that--the slender woman we envy may battle anorexia or be a chain smoker; the man with the successful career may barely know his kids; the student who does it all may be so addicted to caffeine and sleeping pills that she suffers withdrawal without copious amounts of both every day.
We envy other people because it's easier to look at what someone else has/is and be envious than it is to work on/accept ourselves. It's like wishing on a star for stuff to happen. We don't workout at the gym only to be shocked that we are sore the next day. Work equals results. When I want to get better at something or make a new habit, I have to struggle to keep doing that thing (going to the gym, going to bed at the same time each night...). Likewise, if I want to get good at avoiding things, I have to practice that too (no more than one portion of dessert).
So many fitness commercials say they guarantee results in two weeks with just 5 minutes a day. If I spent 5 minutes a day on every last little thing I want to improve upon, and I keep it up for two weeks, it will likely become a habit. Spend 5 minutes cleaning each room in the house and you will see results. Work your abs for 5 minutes a day and you will see results. Read your Bible for 5 minutes a day and you will grow in knowledge. Pray for 5 minutes a day. Sit in silence for 5 minutes a day. It sounds so easy. For some habits it is, but for others this is HARD. I blame our own weaknesses and our cultural ADHD. I find the struggle is worthwhile once I see results, but during the struggle it can be hard to stay positive.
UPDATE: regarding my plan to help with hurricane Sandy relief, I am sketching out a 3 day trip for the youth to go somewhere in the area.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Substitute Teaching
So I've gotten a job as a substitute teacher. It's always been a fact that teaching means you learn a lot, and this job is certainly schooling me. So here are some observations/things I've learned/things I've done as a sub.
Observed: not all schools or classes have textbooks and it's awful for a sub when the subject is math and I have no way of looking up and refreshing my brain on how to do what they're doing. The last time I did calculus was 1999 and most other stuff was before that, so I need a reminder.
I've learned: Always get a schedule of the day for the teacher I'm in for, or else the third graders will wonder why I think they have computer day when it's gym day and the 7th graders will hate me for thinking they eat lunch 15 minutes later.
I've done this: a kindergartner told me a boy had called her a crybaby. She said this as though she were reporting the weather outside, not a hit of whine in her voice. I asked her if she's a crybaby. She calmly answered me, "no." I told her, "Then that boy is wrong. Ignore him."
Observed: Two little girls (sitting next to each other) lost a tooth within minutes of each other. They are third graders, so this was normal. I wondered if the nurse thought I was daring the class to pull their loose teeth.
I've learned: Always get a map of the school. Faculty lunchroom and faculty bathrooms locations are very important things to know.
I've done this: One third grade boy raised his hand throughout the day and told me jokes from a book he had. Toward the end of the day his hand was up, and I asked him, "Does this have anything to do with the Amish?" (we were discussing them). He said yes. I said okay. He then asked another joke question.
Observed: Sometimes a parent is supposed to pick up his/her child and never shows. The child is anxious for hours as a result.
I've learned: Always preface answers to the teachers with "Mrs._______ told me this..." because otherwise they will think you took some kid's word for it!
I've done this: Told a multiracial class I wear the same foundation shade as Casper the Friendly Ghost.
Observed: The kids think it's great when their sub goes to gym and plays with the parachute too, including laying on the floor.
I've learned: Tell the kids to make a sign with their name on their desks. It's hard to corral "you there, in the red pants!" since they answer to their name better.
I've done this: Played Just Dance 2 on the Wii to Walk Like an Egyptian in front of a gym full of 5th graders and beaten the other teacher.
Observed: not all schools or classes have textbooks and it's awful for a sub when the subject is math and I have no way of looking up and refreshing my brain on how to do what they're doing. The last time I did calculus was 1999 and most other stuff was before that, so I need a reminder.
I've learned: Always get a schedule of the day for the teacher I'm in for, or else the third graders will wonder why I think they have computer day when it's gym day and the 7th graders will hate me for thinking they eat lunch 15 minutes later.
I've done this: a kindergartner told me a boy had called her a crybaby. She said this as though she were reporting the weather outside, not a hit of whine in her voice. I asked her if she's a crybaby. She calmly answered me, "no." I told her, "Then that boy is wrong. Ignore him."
Observed: Two little girls (sitting next to each other) lost a tooth within minutes of each other. They are third graders, so this was normal. I wondered if the nurse thought I was daring the class to pull their loose teeth.
I've learned: Always get a map of the school. Faculty lunchroom and faculty bathrooms locations are very important things to know.
I've done this: One third grade boy raised his hand throughout the day and told me jokes from a book he had. Toward the end of the day his hand was up, and I asked him, "Does this have anything to do with the Amish?" (we were discussing them). He said yes. I said okay. He then asked another joke question.
Observed: Sometimes a parent is supposed to pick up his/her child and never shows. The child is anxious for hours as a result.
I've learned: Always preface answers to the teachers with "Mrs._______ told me this..." because otherwise they will think you took some kid's word for it!
I've done this: Told a multiracial class I wear the same foundation shade as Casper the Friendly Ghost.
Observed: The kids think it's great when their sub goes to gym and plays with the parachute too, including laying on the floor.
I've learned: Tell the kids to make a sign with their name on their desks. It's hard to corral "you there, in the red pants!" since they answer to their name better.
I've done this: Played Just Dance 2 on the Wii to Walk Like an Egyptian in front of a gym full of 5th graders and beaten the other teacher.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
Made it!
So we're fine even though the eye of Hurricane passed right over us (which meant we had a weird, eerie calm from 11pm to midnight). Amazingly we've had power this entire time too. I consider it a miracle that the house is fine, no swimming pool in the basement and the big shade tree didn't come crashing down; it didn't even lose any branches. I'm absolutely relived. Honestly, I'm been super anxious since about Thursday. When I picked up my son from school on Friday, I wasn't sure when he'd be going to school next. Not sure about tomorrow yet.
Someone else posted a link to an entire litany for the hurricane, and ended in a short, stand-alone prayer:
"God of heaven and earth, God who carries our lives and the lives of [all in Sandy's path] in your hands, be with all those in peril this day/night. Help us to release our anxieties and fears into your caring hands, knowing in faith that your will for us is life and everlasting good. Send your holy angels to watch over us and guard us. May your angels spread their holy wings to give all in danger shelter against the storm. For you alone, O God, are all good, all life, all love, and that love is for us; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."
I know it's so easy for me to feel relieved right now, and feel I've experienced a miracle in that this area was not turned into a total swamp, because my house is fine, everyone is safe, people without power in this area have access to hot showers and we've stocked up on food and water and Dr. Pepper. I like to think that if the big tree HAD fallen on the house that I would still be praising God for no loss of life and everything else there is to be thankful for: people offering us a place to stay and repair crews.
Really, there are always reasons to be thankful and praise God. It sounds insane to say that in light of all the horrible things that happen in life. As I said above, I didn't have a catastrophe during this hurricane (The problem of evil is called Theodicy), but there are plenty of places that need help cleaning up once the waters recede. I need to go help out. Why? Because people need help, from drinking water to another person to help rip up water-logged carpet from a flooded house.
When awful things happen it's not enough to try to stay out of harm. It's not enough to be glad things weren't worse. We also need to get out there and help. If you think that God can just do it himself then you're denying him an opportunity to work through you.
I'm not just going to preach. I'm posting this so others can hold me accountable: that somehow I will help with Maryland or Delaware clean up efforts.
Someone else posted a link to an entire litany for the hurricane, and ended in a short, stand-alone prayer:
"God of heaven and earth, God who carries our lives and the lives of [all in Sandy's path] in your hands, be with all those in peril this day/night. Help us to release our anxieties and fears into your caring hands, knowing in faith that your will for us is life and everlasting good. Send your holy angels to watch over us and guard us. May your angels spread their holy wings to give all in danger shelter against the storm. For you alone, O God, are all good, all life, all love, and that love is for us; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."
I know it's so easy for me to feel relieved right now, and feel I've experienced a miracle in that this area was not turned into a total swamp, because my house is fine, everyone is safe, people without power in this area have access to hot showers and we've stocked up on food and water and Dr. Pepper. I like to think that if the big tree HAD fallen on the house that I would still be praising God for no loss of life and everything else there is to be thankful for: people offering us a place to stay and repair crews.
Really, there are always reasons to be thankful and praise God. It sounds insane to say that in light of all the horrible things that happen in life. As I said above, I didn't have a catastrophe during this hurricane (The problem of evil is called Theodicy), but there are plenty of places that need help cleaning up once the waters recede. I need to go help out. Why? Because people need help, from drinking water to another person to help rip up water-logged carpet from a flooded house.
When awful things happen it's not enough to try to stay out of harm. It's not enough to be glad things weren't worse. We also need to get out there and help. If you think that God can just do it himself then you're denying him an opportunity to work through you.
I'm not just going to preach. I'm posting this so others can hold me accountable: that somehow I will help with Maryland or Delaware clean up efforts.
Friday, October 26, 2012
Hurricane Sandy. I mean, THAR SHE BLOWS!
I'm feeling anxious about hurricane Sandy. So I'm trying to look on the lighter side of things.
What NOT to do during a hurricane
1. Go outside and try to recreate any bodywash or shampoo ad where they lathered up outside. It's raining hard enough to take a shower out there, but resist the urge.
2. Put out Halloween candy. It will blow away. Keep it inside and within reach.
3. Buy the wrong kind of batteries.
4. Figure you'll just grab drive-thru for dinner while it's hurricaning.
5. Call and ask Comcast or anyone else why your cable is out and your computer won't work in the power outage aftermath.
6. Get a drastically different haircut. There's enough anxiety already.
7. Run errands.
8. Visit a corn maze.
9. Garden.
10. Paint the shutters.
11. Take the dog for a nice, long walk.
12. Illegally copy movies.
13. Walk into Mordor.
14. Gripe about the other candidate.
15. Try to tame a skunk.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Jurassic Park
Okay, clearly the movie changed things from the book. And really there's no way to write this without some spoilers.
SPOILER ALERT: There are so many spoilers coming up.
So we find out right away that the dinosaurs have clearly found a way to get off their island, which is off the west coast of Costa Rica. Procompsognathus have been biting babies and kids, except folks on the mainland haven't figured out yet they're dinosaurs engineered by some nutty rich guy with a vision he hasn't thought through fully and but yet realized.
The nut is John Hammond. He figures out he can take blood from mosquitos that bit dinosaurs 65+ million years ago that have been preserved all this time in the sap of trees. These amber-encased bugs contain dinosaur DNA because apparently red blood cells carry DNA in avians (birds) but for a human you'd have to hunt down a rarer white blood cell. He even invites his grandkids to Jurassic park to show the scientists how safe it is and how certain he is that the park will be a huge hit. In the hour before his death, he curses his grandkids (not to their faces). Why? Keep reading.
Despite the gaggle of scientists, there are SO many problems with Isla Nublar. Dr. Ellie Stattler, a paleobotanist, immediately notices that poisonous ferns have been planted right next to the swimming pool. Yeah, they're authentic Jurassic ferns, but accidentally brushing up against those plants would make a person really sick. If someone inhales spores, they'd die.
Dr. Ian Malcolm is a mathematician and firm believer in Chaos Theory. He's been going around saying that Jurassic Park is a huge accident waiting to happen and he can prove it mathematically. I had some trouble following exactly what this character is talking about (his words are based on the work of James Gleick), but the point is we can't make something that's alive and expect to control it. We can't even totally control the environment if that living thing.
So why did John Hammond curse his grandkids? Because he couldn't control them. He was walking from the lodge to his bungalow and heard a T-Rex roar. There are two such beasts on Isla Nublar, so his panic is somewhat warranted. Despite the hellish problems the park has had over the weekend, he is on the other side of many electric fences from either T-Rex. But he forgets this. He panics, trips, and falls down a hill into a streambed, and breaks his ankle. He hears the roar again and realizes that his grandkids are playing in the control room; the T-Rex roar is being broadcast from park speakers. He spends over an hour trying to climb up the hill, calls for help, and then notices Procompsognathus (compys for short) are gathering around him. He's a crippled animal to these scavengers; an easy meal. He tries to fight but too easily, things he has created kill him. He created selfishly (to make money) and had knowledge, but no real wisdom.
Other failure to control the dinosaurs problems: all the dinosaurs created are female so that they can't breed 'in the wild' on the island. John Hammond's corporation even has plastic eggs in which to insert the embryos. The lighting, moisture, everything has been considered...except the frog DNA used to fill in the holes in the DNA sequences in 5 of the species came from frogs who are able to change gender when all the surrounding frogs are the same gender. Another problem is that no one seems to understand how the main power works. Yet another problem is that a selfish programmer is being paid to steal dinosaur embryos and smuggle them off the island to another bioengineering company. The traitor dies by the way, and his death is just awful.
Now compare John Hammond to God. Both created. Hammond and God created an environment for their created beings to hang out in, and they both created things with free will. Both are superior to their creations. Neither God nor Hammond needed to create anything but chose to create. Both wanted to be around what they created. That's where similarities end.
Hammond tries so hard to control his creation through electric fences, a lysine dependency that is only satisfied through daily tablets for the animals, moats, steel bars, thick glass, tranquilizers, shock sticks, and so on. You get the picture: he's like a tyrant over this island he has claimed. He enjoys his work and is proud of what he's made. But again, despite all the knowledge and information he has employed, he lacks true wisdom. He ignores some of the basic needs of his creatures, such as needing a higher percent of oxygen in the atmosphere.
God stopped at every step during Creation to notice that what he had made was "good". He made a beautiful garden with healthy fruits and vegetables to eat and put the animals and people he made in it. God cultivated a relationship with his creation. He even let the people be the stewards of the garden! He gave them the rules. They could live in the garden he made for them or they could go try to create their own abode. When they screwed up, God let them pay the consequences but never stopped loving them. He also offered his creation a continued relationship with him. His creation pains him with sin, but cannot kill him.
Remember that John Hammond is creating within God's creation. Is he pretending to know better than God? Is he trying to replace God?
SPOILER ALERT: There are so many spoilers coming up.
So we find out right away that the dinosaurs have clearly found a way to get off their island, which is off the west coast of Costa Rica. Procompsognathus have been biting babies and kids, except folks on the mainland haven't figured out yet they're dinosaurs engineered by some nutty rich guy with a vision he hasn't thought through fully and but yet realized.
The nut is John Hammond. He figures out he can take blood from mosquitos that bit dinosaurs 65+ million years ago that have been preserved all this time in the sap of trees. These amber-encased bugs contain dinosaur DNA because apparently red blood cells carry DNA in avians (birds) but for a human you'd have to hunt down a rarer white blood cell. He even invites his grandkids to Jurassic park to show the scientists how safe it is and how certain he is that the park will be a huge hit. In the hour before his death, he curses his grandkids (not to their faces). Why? Keep reading.
Despite the gaggle of scientists, there are SO many problems with Isla Nublar. Dr. Ellie Stattler, a paleobotanist, immediately notices that poisonous ferns have been planted right next to the swimming pool. Yeah, they're authentic Jurassic ferns, but accidentally brushing up against those plants would make a person really sick. If someone inhales spores, they'd die.
Dr. Ian Malcolm is a mathematician and firm believer in Chaos Theory. He's been going around saying that Jurassic Park is a huge accident waiting to happen and he can prove it mathematically. I had some trouble following exactly what this character is talking about (his words are based on the work of James Gleick), but the point is we can't make something that's alive and expect to control it. We can't even totally control the environment if that living thing.
So why did John Hammond curse his grandkids? Because he couldn't control them. He was walking from the lodge to his bungalow and heard a T-Rex roar. There are two such beasts on Isla Nublar, so his panic is somewhat warranted. Despite the hellish problems the park has had over the weekend, he is on the other side of many electric fences from either T-Rex. But he forgets this. He panics, trips, and falls down a hill into a streambed, and breaks his ankle. He hears the roar again and realizes that his grandkids are playing in the control room; the T-Rex roar is being broadcast from park speakers. He spends over an hour trying to climb up the hill, calls for help, and then notices Procompsognathus (compys for short) are gathering around him. He's a crippled animal to these scavengers; an easy meal. He tries to fight but too easily, things he has created kill him. He created selfishly (to make money) and had knowledge, but no real wisdom.
Other failure to control the dinosaurs problems: all the dinosaurs created are female so that they can't breed 'in the wild' on the island. John Hammond's corporation even has plastic eggs in which to insert the embryos. The lighting, moisture, everything has been considered...except the frog DNA used to fill in the holes in the DNA sequences in 5 of the species came from frogs who are able to change gender when all the surrounding frogs are the same gender. Another problem is that no one seems to understand how the main power works. Yet another problem is that a selfish programmer is being paid to steal dinosaur embryos and smuggle them off the island to another bioengineering company. The traitor dies by the way, and his death is just awful.
Now compare John Hammond to God. Both created. Hammond and God created an environment for their created beings to hang out in, and they both created things with free will. Both are superior to their creations. Neither God nor Hammond needed to create anything but chose to create. Both wanted to be around what they created. That's where similarities end.
Hammond tries so hard to control his creation through electric fences, a lysine dependency that is only satisfied through daily tablets for the animals, moats, steel bars, thick glass, tranquilizers, shock sticks, and so on. You get the picture: he's like a tyrant over this island he has claimed. He enjoys his work and is proud of what he's made. But again, despite all the knowledge and information he has employed, he lacks true wisdom. He ignores some of the basic needs of his creatures, such as needing a higher percent of oxygen in the atmosphere.
God stopped at every step during Creation to notice that what he had made was "good". He made a beautiful garden with healthy fruits and vegetables to eat and put the animals and people he made in it. God cultivated a relationship with his creation. He even let the people be the stewards of the garden! He gave them the rules. They could live in the garden he made for them or they could go try to create their own abode. When they screwed up, God let them pay the consequences but never stopped loving them. He also offered his creation a continued relationship with him. His creation pains him with sin, but cannot kill him.
Remember that John Hammond is creating within God's creation. Is he pretending to know better than God? Is he trying to replace God?
Friday, September 21, 2012
Signs You're a Mature Adult
1: You're tempted to do yardwork at someone else's house.
2: Taking a shower helps you feel human again.
3: You chase your cat(s) onto the tiled floor when they're about to puke because it's easier to clean than the carpet or rug.
4: You cart around things like bug repellent, sunscreen, and Band-Aids just in case.
5: You sit in the house alone sometimes with no TV or music on, just for the peace and quiet.
6: You feel so much better after cleaning.
7: You clean when stressed or angry.
8: You largely dislike McDonald's.
9: Reality shows can't hold a candle to documentaries.
10: You know the book is better than the movie.
11: You take more than one pill a day.
12: You've ever thought that youth is wasted on the young.
13: You've said "I'm sorry" and truly meant it.
14: You know how to write thank you notes.
15: You aren't ashamed to ask for help.
16: You eat foods you don't like because they are good for you.
17: Caffeine moves from 'beverage' to 'food group'.
18: You can admit you're wrong without becoming defensive.
19: You research something just to learn about it.
20: You accept certain facts about yourself (I have curly hair. I'm finally okay with it).
21: You are trying to change your bad habits.
22: You've ever put someone else's needs ahead of your own.
23: You are certain you could survive at least a week without a cell phone and computer.
24: You know nostalgia isn't what it used to be ;)
25: You're tired of eating the same flavor all the time and try a new one.
26: "Sleeping in" means you get up no later than 9am.
27: You're certain the 80's weren't that long ago.
28: You're allowed to do the stuff you weren't allowed to do as a kid but no longer care (who wants to watch two movies in a row? And cake for breakfast = a stomachache by lunch).
29: You wish there was a rollover plan for all those naps you refused as a kid.
30: You get to play Sherlock Holmes a lot. Like when you enter a room (why did I come in here?) or need a household item (where on earth is the hammer? Who had it last?....)
31: You know your priorities and stick to them.
32: You know you don't have forever to do the things you want to do, so you don't put them off all the time.
33: You try to waste less.
34: You wish you had less waist.
35: You're psyched about getting an EZ Pass.
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